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Leftists Attempt to Frame Conservative Shop Owner (parody)

Democrats vs Republicans - Which Brain is Better? - YouTube

Vancouver, WA

Many were no doubt hoping that the ‘left vs. right’ arguments would end following the election, but to date those arguments and scandals are growing stronger than ever. In what has been called one of the ‘most ridiculous and ludicrous frame jobs’ in Vancouver’s long and storied history, admitted Leftist shop owner Armand DeMonise has been found guilty, along with several of his friends and family, of attempting to frame their neighboring store owner, Gerald Murikan, for the defacement and destruction of their storefront. DeMonise, who owns a successful sandwich shop, has apparently been feuding with Murikan, who runs a burger restaurant, for many years, as both men have allowed their political ideologies to fuel more than one spat between them.

“I’m not sure who started it any longer,” Murikan, who consented to be interviewed, said, “I made it a point to let it be known that I’m a Republican and I definitely let him know about it when he asked me about it. I have needled him over the years about his liberal ways and beliefs, but never would I think of doing anything to his business. Being opposed to each other is one thing, and yelling at each other is another, but trying to ruin a man’s business just isn’t necessary. I’m not sure why he felt the need to do this, but I hope he learned from it.”

DeMonise was caught on video defacing his own shop, along with several of his friends and family members, who all lied to the police when it was reported the next day. DeMonise even went so far as to plant the items that had been used to mark up and deface his storefront behind Murikan’s place of business, but thanks to the video evidence was found to be lying when the officer on duty examined the area.

At this time DeMonise and his fellow conspirators are being made to pay a hefty fine and will need to pay for the repairs.

@doilydoo tweeted:

Man, I’m a liberal and this is embarrassing. Can’t believe I agree with a Republican, but yeah, there’s no need to take it this far.

@gollygosh3215 tweeted:

Someone stop asking how stupid people can be, too many folks are taking that as a challenge.

Antifa and BLM Wounded in Attempt to Evict “Undesirables” from Apartment Complex (parody)

Some Protests Against Police Brutality Take a More Confrontational Approach  - The New York Times

Seattle, WA

Black Lives Matter and Antifa members discovered how ill-advised it was to ignore a ‘Beware of Dog’ sign earlier this month as several individuals were bitten after intruding on the property of Meyers Frederick in an outlying suburb of Seattle. The protestors were seen going around the neighborhood attempting to ‘convince’ long-time residents that they would soon be evicted as they were living on land that had once belonged to people of color and indigenous peoples. Unfortunately for those that attempted to intrude upon Frederick’s property they opted to climb the fence leading to his backyard to make their point, but were met by three of the five family dogs, all Rottweilers, and were set upon by the animals, who were attempting to defend their home, and their family.

“I don’t know why any person needs that many dogs,” said one protestor, “I’m thinking they’re probably running dog fights or something illegal in there and that’s their protection, which means they’re cowards if they’ve got to use dogs to fend people off. They’re lucky we’re all about saving animals too, otherwise, I don’t know, we would have done something.”

As it was seen by residents of the block, the BLM and Antifa mob scattered rather quickly when the first dog began to bark. Those caught in the backyard were arrested for trespassing, and to date, the dogs have been checked out and found to be perfectly healthy and completely justified in the defense of their home.

@jeezyjucie tweeted:

I’m with the dogs, you don’t come in someone’s backyard and start trouble.

@alladatandwhat tweeted:

So what if you used to live there??? You moved out, someone else came along who could afford it, and they moved in! Move on, be gone!

Of Course It’s Funny…and Depressing

23 College Liberal Memes That Are As Hilarious As They Are Infuriating

Remember how this works, men and women aren’t equal since men can do things that women can’t do, and women can definitely do something that men can’t do. That doesn’t get altered once you change the wrapper, since what’s inside is still pretty much the same. Plus, when it comes to the freedom of speech, a lot of people don’t want you to have free speech unless it’s to agree with them and their ideals, but once you disagree with them they’ll suddenly remember that freedom of speech doesn’t mean freedom from consequences…except for them. See how that doesn’t work? The whole ‘rules for thee but not for me’ is kind of a terrible model to follow, especially when the rules tend to shift whenever those make them feel that they’re about to be subjected to their own policies.

hey liberals! "tolerance." You keep using that wo… | Princess bride quotes,  Funny quotes, Words

There’s no doubt that tolerance is hard to find on both sides of the line as the capitol riot would indicate. But if you’re tolerant then you should have no trouble admitting that the BLM and Antifa riots, sorry, ‘peaceful protests’ (don’t worry, I’m laughing too), were just as wrong and weren’t as provoked as people like to imagine. People die? People are killed by people? People are killed by cops? Cops are killed by people? Such issues need to be taken on a case by case basis, not lumped together to create the overriding narrative that has come to divide the country. Tolerance is learning when to deal with one or many issues as they come along, not bothering to over-generalize and make things worse by stating that they’re all the same. It’s true, the riots of the past four years were not the capitol riot, as they were different instances and are said to have been for different reasons. But tolerance in this case is finding a way to punish those who are guilty, and not take it out on those that have done no wrong.

liberal logic –

Of course not, right? Because they are used to the capitalist system, they are used to being paid, and are used to paying into it. The same system so many condemn is the one they rely so heavily on, and cannot imagine walking away from. Getting paid as much as everyone else for doing the same or more work is a part of the personal vocabulary and rhetoric. But deep down, their adherence to a capitalist system in which some of them might have pulled themselves up by the boostraps, is why their words are as empty as their ideas.

Ayanna Pressley@AyannaPressley · Jan 12The second I realized our “safe room” from the violent white supremacist mob included treasonous, white supremacist, anti masker Members of Congress who incited the mob in the first place, I exited. Furious that more of my colleagues by the day are testing positive.

This one, huh boy. One has to wonder what the words ‘white supremacist’ and ‘treasonous’ even mean any longer, since folks such as Ayanna and many others appear ready and willing to twist any word to their liking.

Conservative-Owned Restaurant Accused of Food Poisoning (parody)

3 Ways to Report Restaurant Food Poisoning - wikiHow

Portland, OR

A lawsuit was brought against a Subway shop in downtown Portland just a few days back when local resident, Jimmy Sodome, became deathly ill from eating a contaminated cold cut combo he’d purchased from the eatery. Jimmy’s live-in, pansexual partner, Hepa Titusinade, alerted local residents to stop shopping from the Subway, but was largely ignored by many when it came out during the investigation that Jimmy had left his sandwich on a windowsill for nearly six hours before consuming it.

“It wasn’t his fault” Hepa commented to reporters, “He got so caught up in his job as a professional protester, we’re both proud liberals so I’m not sure what he was doing at a conservative-run shop that kicked us out for, never mind. It still wasn’t his fault, if the guy had told him to refrigerate his sandwich like they should then it would have been fine.”

Jimmy, who is 35 years old and moved in with Hepa only a few months prior, had been living with his parents, who had pleaded with him to find an apartment of his own when they were asked about their son. Hepa, who is a liberal arts student and part-time protestors and part-time accountant, has refused to answer any more questions upon discovering that the sandwich had spoiled. At this time the lawsuit is still ongoing, but there is little chance that Jimmy will see anything apart from a bill for his legal fees. @reallydog22 tweeted:

Dude, seriously? I’ll bet you’re the type of folks to bring your own hairs to a fine dining restaurant for free meals, right?

@atavantic5534 tweeted:

The guy is in his 30s and doesn’t know a damn thing about life….future of our country right there, oy.

Don’t Bring Up the “Past”

Black Lives Matter: birth of a movement | Black Lives Matter movement | The  Guardian

No matter what you do, don’t bring up the past with certain folks, since they don’t want to hear how the capitol riots equates to the riots that have been ongoing for the past four years. They don’t want to here it, they don’t want to equate it, and will gladly force their ‘facts’ down the throats of anyone that thinks that the riots were anything but peaceful. Despite the burning buildings, despite the property damage, and despite the many upon many people who were asked to leave their homes, were harassed on the streets for no better reason than because they had the wrong shade of skin, many folks will claim that it was justified without fail.

Terrorizing people was justified because of centuries of oppression, didn’t you know? Keeping the cycle going as the ‘oppressors’ who often weren’t born during the worst moments in history, is important to those who never felt that level of oppression. The past is no longer a lesson to learn from when placed in the hands of some groups and individuals, but a bludgeon to be wielded when they feel the need to make a point. It becomes a weapon, this victim-mentality that keeps people from realizing that to be happy, they must first feel the misery of those who suffered so long ago, no matter that this misery is not theirs, that it is not their burden. The past is a weapon in the hands of those that seek to use it for gain of some type, instead of as a lesson why humanity needs to find a way to stand together, without seeking to tear each other apart.

We aren’t our ancestors, and as many would state, this is a good thing, since our ancestors apparently fought incessantly, dividing one another alone lines of race, religion, and any other divisive practice that could be found. There is a reason why unity is rarely, if ever, seen in history, and a part of it is that we seek to divide each other far too often, as it is newsworthy, it is drama, and it gains the attention of so many. Peace is boring obviously, unity leaves people without anything to talk about. But one thing I have learned in all my years thus far, one immutable fact, is that unity is necessary, and incurs a great cost.

Unity is a great thing, and worth fighting for, but the past must remain the past, and not a weapon in the hands of those that would seek to use it to make victims of themselves.

Portland Local Caught Lying on Video (parody)

How to Recognize the Signs That Someone Is Lying

Portland, OR

One thing that some folks don’t want people to remember is that they lied on TV, and in the case of Katherine Jones that ship has unfortunately sailed. During the summer of 2020, when Portland, Oregon was seen as a war zone by many people, Katherine was one of those attempting to convince people that the protests were ‘peaceful’ and that the news media was making things out to be worse than they actually were.

The incident under dispute has to do with what happened during the interview as Katherine was seen to play with her hair almost obsessively, speak in sentence fragments, and attempt to keep the focus of the camera and the interviewer from focusing on the damage that had been done to the city by shifting continually to her right. Unfortunately for Katherine, her mother, Jane Jones, came into frame at that time with a sign reading “Death to Imperial Trumpers”. Jane was followed by a band of Antifa members in black bloc that were currently engaged in tossing garbage cans into the street, blocking up roadways, and harassing diners in outdoor eateries as they passed by.

To this date, Katherine has been engaged with a lawsuit against several news organizations that have picked up this story, as she is seeking damages for slander and libel. As of yet no judge has ruled in her favor and she has found herself drowning in attorney’s fees, and as a result has started a GoFundMe account in order to pay her bills. At this time the account has only raised a little over two hundred dollars, but Katherine is confident that ‘her people’ in her words, will come through for her.

@ohmylawd43 replied:

It’s a damn shame that those ‘people’ run out faster than a dine n’ dash when the check comes…

@jimmyjoddzodd replied:

You take the word Democrats and turn it into Dem actors, it’s about as truthful as they get…

Local Police Fail to Respond to Neighborhood Emergency (parody)

Armed Person Suspected of Drinking in Public Wounded in Police Shooting  Outside Apartment Building in South L.A. | KTLA

Beaverton, OR

A prominent family was kept waiting for the police during a break-in just a few nights ago and apprehended the would-be burglars by accident as Murray Kayburne tripped over a floor lamp while trying to run away from one of the thieves.

“I didn’t know what to do since the police didn’t want to do their jobs and we don’t own a gun. I had a really heavy wooden stick that I use for walking and might have tried to hit them over the head. But when the first person approached me I decided it was better to run and get back to my family upstairs. Then I tripped over a lamp and the next thing I knew the guy behind me was on the ground, knocked out I guess, and the others were running away. That’s when the cops showed up, finally.”

The reason behind a squad car showing up late to the call has not been disclosed, though it has been revealed that the Kayburne’s have filed three false police reports on several of their neighbors in a five-year time period and have been quite vocal towards local authorities and their belief that the local police precinct needs to be defunded. It was revealed that the thieves belonged to a local chapter of Black Lives Matter and that they have been preying upon various homes over the course of the past several months. At this time the Kayburne’s have reported that nothing was stolen and that they are certain that this was an attempt by either Patriot Prayer or the Proud Boys to frame the ‘proud name’ of BLM.

Both organizations have explicitly stated that they do not condone this type of behavior and that the individuals that are currently being held in Multnomah County are not a part of any active chapter. When contacted to hear their side of the story however, Black Lives Matter respondents declined to speak with anyone.

@Jibberjabber23 replied:

Yeah, they ain’t gonna talk because they know their people done f-ed up.

@olebihiotches replied:

You expect the cops to come help your stupid butt when you’ve been doggin’ them for so long? You’re a special kind of stupid ain’t ya?

You Control the Narrative, You Control the People

Mainstream Media Meme Gallery - Politically Incorrect Humor

This is how it works when media is used to spread their message far and wide to the masses. What’s unfortunate is in the spirit of equality one must look at all news sources, even those they agree with, in order to make certain that they’re not allowing personal bias to lead them down the wrong road. Identifiable facts and evidence that can be deduced through hopefully unbiased sources, which are rare, is what should be looked at as the truth, but it’s a matter of personal choice. People do still have the right to determine what they believe is right, what is true, and what is contradictory to the message that is being spread by one news source or another that is actively speaking out against one individual, one party, or one idea.

Feelings are not normally a great way to determine who one will follow and why, but the gut feeling that some folks feel can be reliable when it comes to how we treat each other and how we believe. It is far too easy to demonize another human being when the crowd, the mob, is being influenced by a news service that is continually changing and controlling the narrative that people see and wish to follow. At some point rational and earnest discussion becomes less important as the need for reason and debate breaks down into name-calling and mud-slinging that has been the norm as of late.

Listen carefully to the narrative that you’re being fed by your news sources, all of them, and make your own decision on how to react to the world around you. The moment an individual allows the mob to tell them how to think is the moment that the narrative can change to whatever the mob wants, and the individual is then lost.

Family Matters (Lenore Legacy 5)

Pin on Places to visit

Las Vegas, Nevada

            “So it doesn’t bother you, to just help who you want to help even if they’re on opposing sides?”

            The white-haired, young-looking man in front of her scoffed, as though this was the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard. Fishing a pack of cigarettes out of his back pocket as they made their way along the Strip, the bright lights and flashing marquees lighting their way, he lit the smoke before answering.

            “If I worried about who I was helping and why, I would have given up on this world a long time ago. You’re all fucked and you’re all worth saving in some measure, so I figure being the go-between is about as much fun as I’m allowed to have without having to pick a side.”

            “You’re not worried that someone from either side might take offense to this?”

            The traffic that was a constant within this part of the world, an addition to the bright lights and continual noise of Vegas, thrummed to their left, but she ignored most of it as she listened to Abel, one of the last people she would have expected to come to her aid. He was, after all, one of those that been screwed over the most by the ‘good book’ since his involvement had ended when his pain in the ass brother Cain had ‘slain’ him and gone on his way. Apparently back then no one had bothered to check for a pulse, since Abel had been very much alive, but like so many others within the good book he’d been forgotten, passed over, and left to his own devices. Unlike a lot of others that had been left out of the story though, he’d been given a reprieve of sort from death’s cold threshold by learning of a certain trick that most human beings had forgotten a long time ago.

            They were all vessels. It didn’t matter how much they took in, what form it took, or how it was done, every human was a vessel for energy, but many of them didn’t realize it. Abel had realized it long ago when a traveler had come to the place where Cain had left him and attempted to rouse him. The transfer had been instinctual, a hungry soul trying to feed on anything he could, and the power, one of many that the big boss had never told His children about, had taken over. And after a couple of millennia of finding the need to feed on others and keep low, here he was.

            “If someone takes offense to it then so be it. My own brother took offense to me being a good son and beat the living hell out of me. If you can think of something worse than that, please, tell me all about it. The demons and the angels leave me alone for the most part, and if they don’t, well, there’s a reason I still look this young. But I don’t provoke it, and I don’t go looking for it.”

            “But they come to you anyway.”

            Still walking, Abel pointed a finger at her as he smiled, “Smart girl. Now, where and when did you want to start this little, uh, let’s call it a scuffle?”

            “It’s going to be public,” she said with a sigh, “I don’t think there’s any getting around that, since I’m not leaving the city.”

            “Well, there are other places apart from the Strip to do this. Back alleys, parking lots, parks, so on and so forth.”

            “I think it needs to be public, so that others can see,” she replied, casting her gaze from one side of the street to the next, “Is there a casino that has a bigger lot than the others?”

            Abel shrugged, “There’s plenty of space around town, I mean the Planet Hollywood Resort has a ton of space. I could even get you up to the top of the Mandalay Bay. Hell, you could even fight on the tarmac over at the airport. That would make a statement and a half.”

            “I need someplace that I can use to dictate the pace of the fight,” Lenore said, stopping where she was as she glanced back to make sure no one was trying to move past her. Thankfully, as busy as it was, people had given them enough space to move about unhindered.

            “This is Vegas lady,” Abel snickered, “Anywhere you go you’re bound to draw a crowd, at least on the Strip.”

            Lenore inhaled through her nostrils, gazing up the Strip, then down it.

            “I’ve got an idea. Let’s go.”

            “Yes ma’am,” Abel said, reaching in a pocket for his cigarettes.

                                                            *                      *                      *

Treasure Island Casino

            “This city is rife with demons and angels alike, and we can’t find her?”

            “Unlike you, I’m not equipped with a homing beacon,” Gabe stated, reclining in his seat as the lights around them painted a muted tableau of the area. Machines colored in gaudy shades of red, yellow, and other various hues were everywhere, while the green felt tables with their various numbers and markings kept the humans happy as they frittered away their life savings upon one game of chance after another. Many of them thought they might get lucky and walk away with a bit more than they came with, but many would leave with next to nothing, and might even lose more than they intended.

            “I trust you’ve called someone who won’t mind my presence?” Gladys said with a smirk. She’d remained outwardly chipper since arriving in this forsaken city, and had remained so while in his company, but Gabe didn’t know how much longer he could keep this up. She was a vessel, a being that knew how to draw in demons and angels alike, and he’d mistaken her for another demon-touched that knew how to draw upon the dark energy of the foul and unclean spirits around her. This made her dangerous, as she had already absorbed the essence of his immediate superior, Aubrie. He had no doubt that his other superiors weren’t going to look kindly on this, especially considering that he hadn’t attempted to detain her. There was one problem though. He wasn’t certain that he could.

            “Azazel is able to move quicker than we might,” Gabe replied, not looking at her, “He’ll be able to move through this city quicker than anyone.”

            “Mm,” she replied, “But will he?”

            “Maybe,” Gabe said, turning about as he felt a brush of something he couldn’t see, “He is a fallen angel after all, but he hasn’t had a lot of love for the lot of us lately.”

            “I wonder why,” came the deep, bass voice of a man that came to stand directly in front the two of them, a colorful drink in either hand.

            “Azazel,” Gabe said with a nod, noting the drinks, “Are those for us?”

            “No, I enjoy double-fisting it, just ask your mom.”

            “How delightful,” Glady said with a titter, “What’s in them?”

            “A Scooby Snack for the lady,” Azazel said, his large black hand, or the hand of the person he was currently using, setting the bright green drink on the table, “and something I know you don’t get enough of Gabe, a Sex on the Beach.” The half-breed inhaled slowly through his nostrils as the big black man pulled up a chair to sit down, his bulk making the wood and metal construct creak a bit as he settled in.

            “Nothing for you?” Gabe said with a raised eyebrow.

            “Mine’s coming,” Azazel replied, looking squarely at Gabe.

            “So, do you actually feel the effect of the alcohol, or is it a disconnected feel when you’re inhabiting someone like this?” Glady asked, stirring her drink with the straw.

            “I like that, ‘inhabiting’,” the big man said, grinning at Gladys. A server arrived at their table at that moment, the pretty young woman smiling as she was paid to do while delivering two shots of an amber liquid and a tall, citrus-looking drink as Azazel thanked her, making certain, or so it appeared, that he didn’t touch her. The look of his eyes made it clear that he’d like to though. As he turned back to the table he saw Gladys looking, though she didn’t make any attempt to hide her interest.

            “Just imagine what it would be like to ride in a body like that,” Azazel said with a huge grin, “Imagine getting ridden in a body like that, or riding a body like that. Oh, the sensations a person could have.”

            “I can only imagine,” Glady said, taking a sip of her drink as she shuddered slightly, “Ooha, strong one.”

            “It’s good shit though,” Azazel said, taking one shot after the other as he set both shot glasses on the table with a distinctive thump, “These bartenders here are top of the line, they’re not like those pussies over at the Mandalay Bay that don’t want to get in trouble and only serve so many drinks at a time. I mean come on, this is Vegas! Who cares if a person falls on their lips from too much? Casinos aren’t exactly known for having entirely clean reputations anyway. People get the idea of what goes down when they step in the doors.”

            “Are you finished?” Gabe interrupted.

            “Well hello, welcome to the conversation,” Azazel quipped, grinning at Gladys before looking back to Gabe, “Take a drink half-breed.”

            “I’d rather not.”

            “Then I’d rather not help,” Azazel shrugged, “But I’ll gladly sit here and bullshit for a while. I’ve got nothing else to do except move from person to person since you uptight pricks keep rousting me from one host to another.”

            “You’re allowed to stay here with certain conditions,” Gabe said firmly, “Don’t make the mistake of thinking that you can’t be persecuted further.”

            “I’m what?” Azazel said, leaning forward slowly, a dangerous look coming the dark features he wore, “Say that shit again half-breed, and see how fast I rip those fuckin’ wings off your back for everyone to see.”

            Gabe didn’t budge, “You’d have a dozen angels descending on you the moment you touched me.”

            Azazel smirked, “You’d be in pieces before any of them even knew what was going on you little prick. You want my help, you’ll mind what you say, or I’ll remind myself why I don’t enjoy inhabiting your kind.”

            The two continued to glare at each other as Glady sipped at her drink, enjoying the creaminess of it and the slightly sour flavor that came from the ingredients mixing together. After several moments of trying to stare each other down the two sat back, perhaps sensing that neither one of them was going to budge. Gabe reached over, picking up his drink as he nodded to Azazel, who did not reply or even move. As the half-breed took a small sip, Azazel finally did appear to relax.

            “Just because you have a job to do doesn’t mean you have to be as uptight as your fuckin’ bosses,” Azazel said calmly, picking up his own drink as he took a long pull from it. “Hoo! That’ll put lead in your pencil, sure enough.”

            “I’ll take your word for it,” Gabe said stonily, “In any case, I need, we need, you to locate a woman for us. Her name is Lenore, and she’s-“
            “A vessel, like her, no offense.” Azazel raised his palm to Gladys following his pointing finger, to which she replied by shrugging it away.

            “I don’t care what people call me,” Glady said, taking a sip of her drink as she swallowed and said, “I know what I am. But this bitch, my daughter, she’s a tough nut. If you’re not careful she’ll likely try to suck you right into her. It’s likely she’s pulled another demonic being into recently since we did find a dried-out husk not too long ago, just today in fact. It’d be a surprise if the cops or someone else didn’t stumble across it at some point.”

            “Shit, she doesn’t finish?”

            Gabe cleared his throat, “Can you help us?”

            “Well, yeah,” Azazel said in a matter of fact tone, “But what am I dealing with here? Is this bitch, as you put it,” he nodded at Gladys, who nodded in turn, “Going to be looking to suck me into her too? I’ve met a lot of vessels, and they’re hungry fuckers from what I can tell. But not a one has been able to get me yet.”

            “She’s not much different from any other vessel as far as I know. Unless you have something to add,” Gabe said, raising an eyebrow in Gladys’ direction.

            “She’s just a tough one, that’s all I can give. She’s taken down some fairly rough and tumble demons and at least one or two devils that I can guess, judging by her appearance.”

            “What, she’s projecting?”

            Projecting was dangerous for any vessel, as it typically meant that the human host was beginning to take on the form or appearance of those spirits they were absorbing into their bodies. When this happened, as Gabe and Azazel both knew, the vessel had to expel the spirit quickly or find a dark corner of the world to absorb it completely until the physical effects wore off.

            “No, nothing like that,” Gladys said, keeping that damnable smile on her face, “But she is a very tough individual to resist. She has taken down a few very powerful demons in her time.”

            “Much like her mother I presume. But you can absorb angels as well I take it,” Azazel said, taking a sip of his drink as she nodded. He then cast his gaze to Gabe, smirking as the half-breed rolled his eyes.

            “That must make you nervous, huh?”

            “A bit,” Gabe admitted, “She did absorb Aubrie.”

            Azazel raised his dark brows as he regarded Gladys again, “No shit?”

            “None,” Gladys said with a smile, “She was ready to kill me, and left me no choice.”

            “Yeah, that sounds like Aubrie,” Azazel said with a sigh, rattling the ice in his glass as he raised it up, hoping to get the attention of a passing server. It only took a moment as he set the glass down on the next server’s tray and ordered another round of drinks for himself, placing a twenty dollar bill on her tray as he remained careful not to touch her.

            “It would be nice if you could get to this soon,” Gabe said, drumming his fingers on the table.

            Azazel scoffed as the waitress left to get his order, “And it would be nice you could eat my ass with a spoon,” he finished with a snort, “We haven’t discussed what’s in this for me yet. That’s the part that’s most interesting to me, you know that.”

            The sounds of the casino continued around them unabated as Gabe stared hard at the big black man, his jaw working as Gladys continued to sip her drink. She was rather enjoying the show as of now, and wanted to see how it would end.

            They would catch her daughter eventually.

                                                            *                      *                      *

The Luxor Resort

            “This will work,” Lenore said with a smirk, “It’s the perfect spot to use. Now we just need to attract the right attention.”

            “That shouldn’t be a problem,” Abel replied, turning about as he took in the attraction known as The Oasis Pool, one of the Luxor’s biggest features and one that was accessible only by the guests, and for good reason. In recent months this area had been largely off limits to everyone, thanks to the damned virus that the humans had manufactured somehow. But thankfully cooler heads had prevailed finally, and the pool had reopened, but with strict guidelines like everything else.

            Abel put his hands up, using them to frame the scene for himself before shifting the view to Lenore, who gave him a sly grin as she posed a few times. He chuckled as well, “This would be the perfect place for an epic showdown, so long as one of your opponents has the ability to do that little time stop thing. Do you know how to do it?”

            Lenore shook her head, casting her gaze around the massive pool space. From where they stood they could see all four corners of the pool as it dominated the rear of the resort. There were pyramids everywhere thanks to the ridiculous nature of the casino, as well as columns massive walkways, and an entire Egyptian motif that she found more than a little gaudy.

            “The last time I tried nearly tore me apart,” she said, “I thought I could call upon the power of the demon that I’d taken in, and it worked for a few seconds, but I couldn’t sustain it.”

            “What about your mother?”

            Lenore’s good cheer melted away as she glanced at him, “What about the bitch?”

            “Can she use the time stop?”

            “Not that I know of,” Lenore replied, “But then, we haven’t really been that close for a while. How soon can we make this happen?”

            “I can get right on it if you want,” he said with a shrug, “But it’s likely that Gabe and your mom are currently still looking for you. If I was Gabe though, some low-level little pissant thinking he was something he wasn’t, I’d be looking for someone that could help out, meaning a high-level…no, not that. Gabe has too much humility to pull that bullshit.”

            “Would he tap one of the demons within the city? If he had no choice?”

            “Not a demon, not that guy,” Abel chuckled, shaking his head, “But I can see him calling on someone that might still be associated with the big boss, or someone that used to be. Right now though that’s pretty uncertain to be honest, since Gabe is usually so predictable, I mean you could set your watch by the way this guy operates. But if you’re saying that he’s with your mother, a vessel, and that they’re not trying to kill each other, then I’m not sure anymore. I still don’t think he’d work with a demon, but the chances are good that he’s going to try to find someone, and given the contacts that most angels make, even half-breeds, it’s bound to be someone that will carry a little bit of weight in this city.”

            “Would it be anyone you know?”

            Abel rolled his eyes, “Babe, I know a lot more people in this city, and more than just people, than Gabe could ever dream. Little baby angel’s nuts hadn’t dropped yet when I was making contacts from one end of this dirt ball to the other.”

            Lenore’s gaze flared slightly as she said, “Don’t call me ‘babe’, I fucking hate that.”

            Abel brought his palms together in a quick sign of peace, nodding once as he said, “Sorry, old habits and all. But as to your question, I know plenty of people in this burg, but trying to pin down just who Feathers could be working with is bound to be a little tough since he uses them as tools, I use them for entertainment from time to time, and for services rendered.”

            “’Feathers’?” Lenore asked with a bemused smile on her face.

            Abel nodded, smiling as he said “I love fucking with them as much as I can. The big boss doesn’t let them touch me, something about having gone through enough for the sake of humanity and some shit. But it pisses ‘em off something fierce.”

            “So can you get things moving?”

            “The sooner the better, right? You’re sure that you’re ready?”

            “No,” she admitted, “But I’ll be damned again if I don’t try to end this once and for all. I get the feeling there are a lot of other challenges to face following this, but I want to get this one out of the way, pronto.”

            Abel nodded, “I feel that. So, are you going to stick around, see the sights, that kinda shit?”

            “I’m going to secure my battleground,” she said with a grin, “If that’s what you meant.”

            Abel’s smile was positively evil as he said, “Oh yeah, that’s exactly what I meant.”

The Keenest Edge (part V)

Untitled Document

Keep it safe.

“What the hell?” he muttered to himself, turning one way and then another. Jerry didn’t like things he couldn’t understand, to a point. Voices whispering in his head, that definitely qualified as beyond the point. He almost missed yet another oddity that was making his head spin thanks to the strange voice, but as he raised his right hand to run it through his hair he finally saw it.


The highly-detailed and strangely realistic tattoo that wound it’s way from around his right wrist had the appearance of a staff with a, was that a snake’s tail? Maybe it was a tentacle circling his wrist, he couldn’t be certain. But upon taking his coat off he saw that the strange tattoo wound its way up his arm until it finally terminated in a blazing crystal colored a deep black with white highlights all around it. How the hell had that happened?

A knock at his door startled Jerry as he instinctively pulled his shirt sleeve over the upper part of the tattoo and put his coat back on. He didn’t know why he’d done it, but at the moment he was going with the strange things that were happening, since there was a good chance that he was dreaming, maybe.

Gripping the knob with his left hand he opened the door a crack, and was rewarded with a very fit and very good-looking redhead with the bluest eyes he’d ever seen. Jerry opened the door a little wider, smiling in his most charming manner.

“Hi,” he started out, “Can I help you?”

“I was just making sure everything was okay down here,” the woman said, peering into his apartment, “I heard a shot and was worried.”

An alarm started ringing in the back of his mind as he stood in his doorway, but Jerry ignored it, thinking that a woman that stood nearly a head shorter than himself couldn’t be that big of a threat, especially when he could see both of her hands in plain sight.

“Hey,” she said, her eyes widening slightly, “Nice tattoo, can I see it?”

Jerry grinned, but again, that alarm started to sound in his head again. This time he decided to listen.

“I ah, I had an intruder in my place,” he said, keeping his arm behind him, “I was just about to call the cops.”

“Oh,” she replied, sounding a bit crestfallen for some reason, “Can I at least see your tattoo?”

Something odd was going on, but as he’d been doing for the last few minutes, he decided to go with it, no matter that he would probably hate himself in the next instant.

“No,” he said simply, closing the door in her face. “Keep it safe,” he breathed to himself, glancing down at his arm, “Okay then.”

The End