Leftists Attempt to Frame Conservative Shop Owner (parody)

Vancouver, WA

Many were no doubt hoping that the ‘left vs. right’ arguments would end following the election, but to date those arguments and scandals are growing stronger than ever. In what has been called one of the ‘most ridiculous and ludicrous frame jobs’ in Vancouver’s long and storied history, admitted Leftist shop owner Armand DeMonise has been found guilty, along with several of his friends and family, of attempting to frame their neighboring store owner, Gerald Murikan, for the defacement and destruction of their storefront. DeMonise, who owns a successful sandwich shop, has apparently been feuding with Murikan, who runs a burger restaurant, for many years, as both men have allowed their political ideologies to fuel more than one spat between them.

“I’m not sure who started it any longer,” Murikan, who consented to be interviewed, said, “I made it a point to let it be known that I’m a Republican and I definitely let him know about it when he asked me about it. I have needled him over the years about his liberal ways and beliefs, but never would I think of doing anything to his business. Being opposed to each other is one thing, and yelling at each other is another, but trying to ruin a man’s business just isn’t necessary. I’m not sure why he felt the need to do this, but I hope he learned from it.”

DeMonise was caught on video defacing his own shop, along with several of his friends and family members, who all lied to the police when it was reported the next day. DeMonise even went so far as to plant the items that had been used to mark up and deface his storefront behind Murikan’s place of business, but thanks to the video evidence was found to be lying when the officer on duty examined the area.

At this time DeMonise and his fellow conspirators are being made to pay a hefty fine and will need to pay for the repairs.

@doilydoo tweeted:

Man, I’m a liberal and this is embarrassing. Can’t believe I agree with a Republican, but yeah, there’s no need to take it this far.

@gollygosh3215 tweeted:

Someone stop asking how stupid people can be, too many folks are taking that as a challenge.