How to detect a sinkhole — before it swallows you up

Longview, WA

            Natural disasters have a way of making people believe in omens, luck, and fortunes that are decidedly good or bad. Just a few days ago however the luck of a local Black Lives Matter group turned for the worse as during their march down Louisiana Street near Kessler Boulevard. While making their way through town the group failed to notice the faint trembling beneath their feet as they crossed over a pond leading back into the city. It was only when the earth appeared to split open and the blacktop cracked and collapsed with a thunderous roar that those nearby figured that something was wrong. Since the road had been closed off earlier in the day there was no traffic, and miraculously enough, no one was injured too badly as they fell into the ten-foot deep crevasse that suddenly opened beneath them.

            “I was out in my yard watching them come along and shaking my head. Next thing you know, ka-boom, they’re all falling into this huge hole that just opened up.” This came from a local that chose to remain anonymous, “It might sound kind of mean but it almost feels like this is either God’s way or nature’s way of saying ‘shut the hell up and get with the program.”

            Nearly 80 people fell into the sinkhole that opened up, but thankfully every one of them was recovered, some with minor injuries, scrapes, and bruises, but none with any critical or serious harm. The city is currently wondering how they’ll go about fixing this problem but for now it’s safe to state that Louisiana Street will be closed down to thru traffic and detour routes will be used for an undetermined period of time.

@JadedJay tweeted:

            Some people smite, and some get smote, and BLM, you got SMOTE.

@AnxiousAnnie tweeted:

            Did the BLM fall down go boom? Awww

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