Santa Clarita, CA
Hate crimes are popping up at an alarming rate these days, or at least crimes that are being labeled as hate crimes are. Just recently at a local coffee shop an admitted activist by the name of Janey Allupst called the police on a young black man by the name of Alexander Drust, claiming that he was guilty of performing a hate crime against her. Janey, who is also black, made the claim that Alexander had purchased a bottle of 2 percent milk and was brazenly drinking it in front of her in the coffee shop, knowing full well that his action was racist and constituted a hate crime.
“She started yelling at me and throwing a fit about me drinking milk,” Alexander said in an interview, “She told me that black people are lactose ‘ontolerate’, that’s what she said. When I tried to correct her she told me to get out and take my racist drink with me. I said thanks to the manager when she told the lady to leave, because really I couldn’t stop laughing. Maybe if milk would have come out of my nose she would have really gone nuts and hit me, I don’t know.”
The police were called on Janey, and quickly found out via dispatch that she was responsible for several other calls that had come in within the past few weeks in regards to hate crimes. It would appear that Janey is no stranger to county lockup and that she’s been repeat offender for some time, meaning she’ll be given an extended stay most likely when she meets with the judge for arraignment. As of now Janey is currently being held without bail and has refused to speak with anyone.
So even a black person can’t drink milk without being called racist? That’s, um, equality I guess?
I’d say he should have dumped it on her, but that would have been a waste of his drink. Black people can drink milk, it’s not like it’s something that can’t happen.