Can you scream and rant and rave for more than ten seconds at a time?
Can you demand things you haven’t earned but desperately want just because you feel entitled?
Can you feel persecuted when one really cares?
Can you demand laws that apply just to you and no one else?
Can you deny someone their right to speak even while you demand that they afford you the same right?
Can you see anyone that doesn’t share your views as racist, misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic, sexist, and just plain wrong in any way?
CONGRATULATIONS, YOU can be a Social Justice Warrior!
Just sign your order form, crayon is okay, neutral colors so no one is offended and everyone’s feelings are accounted for, and then hand it in if you feel like it, or not, according to what you feel is right for you. Someone will contact you in a non-threatening manner when they feel that they’ve aligned their spirit so as not to cause you any undue stress as you prepare to step out of your safe space into a world that will probably hate you because you hate them for daring to assume anything about you, especially your gender or pronoun preference.
So onward Social Justice Warrior! Make us all proud and repeat the same chants and rants at the top of your voice. Show those other people that you’re strong, that you’re morally fit!
And once you’ve done that settle back into your little safe space and realize that you’ve become the latest internet meme. Seriously, tuck your feelings into your purse or whatever you call those things now, and try to understand why ‘social justice warrior’ is just another term for ‘sheople behaving badly’.