It sounds a little odd to put things in this kind of perspective but when you have one or more kids you might feel this way some days. It’s a feeling that comes and goes more often than not since the love you have for kids doesn’t allow a parent to see them as enemies, but the idea that they’re out to frustrate you on purpose doesn’t just go away so easily sometimes.
There are a few things you can do to remedy this of course and all of them have at least something to do with:
- Taking a deep breath
- Finding a calm place to sit and relax, and:
- Remembering that you are the adult.
Taking a deep breath is the easiest part.
Okay, so none of it is easy. Some days your kids will be all over you, asking questions, throwing fits, experiencing mood swings, and generally just being a pain in the backside for reasons you can’t understand. Even the most patient person in the world will need a moment after a day such as this, and the most important thing to do first and foremost is breathe, just breathe, and let whatever irritation, frustration, or anger that you might be feeling drain out.
Your kids aren’t out to get you, no matter what it feels like. They’re not be contrary or ornery just because they want to. Usually there is a very good reason why they’re acting out, but you have to be patient enough to ask them what’s going on. Keep in mind that a lot of kids don’t have the life experience that is needed to deal with the emotions they go through sometimes and need someone there to help guide them and understand just what it is that they’re feeling. So breath, calm down, and move on to the next part of the process.
Find a calm place if you can.
Even if it’s just a calm spot in the same room, take the time to tune it all out for just a moment if you can and gather your thoughts. Your children won’t understand why you snap at them if you let go of that emotion in one big rush, nor should you try to just ‘get it all out’ at once. That can lead to misunderstandings and bruised feelings that can later on become something much worse if you do such a thing on a regular basis.
Take a calming breath, relax, and do your best to center yourself before you speak with your kids. If it’s possible that is, because honestly kids don’t always allow such a thing to happen.
You are the adult.
You’ve had the life experience, you know how to deal with emotions, or should at least be able to recognize them when they come. Not every adult is as capable as the next when it comes to dealing with intense emotions, but with children it pays to remember that you are the elder and have been through what they are going through, and should be able to draw from that experience to better help your children.
They look to you to solve their problems, no matter how small or great they might seem. An adult has to be able to comfort their children, not the other way around.
Some days it does seem like a free for all that pits you against your kids, but what needs to be remembered is that your kids depend and rely upon you, no matter how they act or what they say.