Lately it seems like there have been a multitude of posts denoting the emotional and psychological “death” of men who are married and have children. Is this for real? Did the rot start to spread once the ring went on their fingers? Or are they reacting like children because they can’t live the glamorous and danger-filled lives they want because they now have that dreaded word “gasp” RESPONSIBILITY? Whatever it is, those hardcore wannabes that think marriage is a permanent chain around man’s neck seem to forget one immutable fact: marriage is a choice.
That’s right, you choose if you want to get married and you choose if you want to stay single. If someone pressures you into marriage then it might be time to rethink your life one way or another. If they genuinely want to be with you and you feel the same then it might be time to change. If the opposite is true then get away, but don’t feel the need to make generalized statements and attack others for their beliefs about marriage and children. It might be your opinion, but remember this, opinions are like assholes, everyone’s got them and all of them can stink.
Addressing the idea of “death” by marriage and children, well, it goes without saying that men who say this have either been hurt in the past and are now little more than wounded boys lashing out against something they don’t have, or are unfortunate kids that didn’t have the type of role models they needed growing up. Marriage is a choice, as is having kids. You might think that sometimes kids are an accident, but to be quite honest they’re a blessing to those that give birth or to those that will make their lives worth living. A man’s death doesn’t slowly begin to happen once the ring slips over their finger, nor the first time their child cries out to the world to let everyone know they’ve arrived.
That is when a man’s life really begins.
Your life doesn’t end when you’re stuck in a go-nowhere job so you can support your family, or are forced to come home and endure children that don’t seem to listen.
That’s when real men step up.
The myth that most men who aren’t completely whipped don’t want kids is about as real as pro-wrestling match. There’s some truth to it, but overall it’s an act.
Real men want to see their children grow and succeed.
Men are a lot of things, but one thing they are not is stuck. What this means is that they aren’t stuck into the bad boy, beer-swilling, monster-truck lovin’, huntin’ and fishin’, smoke ’em if you got ’em, hot rod cruisin’, Mr. fixit mentality. Unless you haven’t been paying attention the real men are the ones that are capable of all that and still can find dignity in playing pretend with their sons and daughters regardless of the game. Real men encompass more than just the “me first and me only” mentality. Real men aren’t the type to just spread their seed and keep moving. That’s not a tough guy. A tough guy will get up at all hours of the night with their child if needed. They’ll help their wives when it’s required, they’ll stand up for their family and do what’s necessary, because they know in the end that the family will always be there for them.
Because really, are your friends going to reward you the way a wife can? Are they going to hug you and make you feel important like your kids will? Not if you’re the ultra-macho man’s man you think you are.
If you choose to stay single then by all means, enjoy your life. Don’t trash on the lives of others by making such ignorant and neanderthal-statements such as “why married men are dead inside”. Take that shit-smelling opinion somewhere else besides social media, because in all honesty, real men aren’t whipped, we just don’t have to be hardcore all the time.
You want to know the difference between the hardcore man and the real man? The real man knows when to be hardcore. The other guy couldn’t be as tough as the real man if he tried.
But if you’ve still got an issue like that my friend, I can always flip the switch…..